Dating advice

First message ideas that get replies

You've matched — now what? The first message is where most people freeze or fall flat. A little effort here goes a long way.

Skip "hey"

"Hey" and "how's it going?" give the other person nothing to work with. They're the most-ignored openers there are.

Ask about a photo, an interest or a prompt. It shows you actually looked, and it makes replying easy.

A message that ends in a question gets a reply far more often than one that doesn't. Keep it light and open.

Settle a debate — "Right — best Sunday roast in Hull, go."
Spot the place — "That looks like Hessle foreshore — is that your go-to walk?"
Shared interest — "Fellow live-music fan — best gig you've been to lately?"

One good line beats a paragraph. Be warm, be curious, and give them an easy way to reply.

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What's a good first message on a dating app?

Something that references their profile and ends in a light question — it shows effort and makes replying easy. Skip "hey."

Why am I not getting replies?

Usually the opener. Swap "hey" for a question about their photos, interests or prompts.

Should I send a long first message?

No — one warm, specific line with a question works better than a paragraph.